Player 1 vs Player 2: Back Attack

At last—a way to harness sibling rivalry for good. This massage t-shirt lets two small humans battle it out in a high-stakes, low-impact competition right on your back. With printed instructions for 20 fist pounds, 20 karate chops, and a final 20-hit finish, this shirt transforms you into a horizontal arena of questionable wellness and unearned bragging rights.

Who wins? Whoever finishes first. Who loses? Honestly, no one—because you're lying down and technically being massaged.

Product Features:

- Double-needle sleeve and bottom hem for durability—because someone will get overexcited
- Size and care label inside the collar to prevent itchy distractions during intense spa combat
- Lightweight, stretchy fabric (95% polyester / 5% spandex) designed for maximum stomping comfort
- Regular fit with extra large sizes available—more surface area, less conflict

Care Instructions:

- Machine wash cold (30°C / 90°F), inside out—because tiny fists aren’t known for precision
- Do not bleach (even if someone spills applesauce mid-match)
- Do not tumble dry—air dry while you lie there questioning your life choices
- Iron, steam, or dry with medium heat—if you’re ever allowed vertical time again
- Absolutely no dry cleaning—this is parenting, not dry-clean-only adulting